6 years ago today I heard the words, "you have cancer." I had no idea how things would turn out --somethings turned out better than I imagined and some things far worse. I made a determination that cancer would be a moment in my life and indeed it has been--This past year has been one of looking inward to what I would have my life be now. I am living "my story right now" and in that I find myself more determined to be a good mom and wife and really explore both my spirituality and my creativity. I am writing more and more and I am living in today. Right here right now was a lesson I really needed to learn and my experience in the trenches of cancer treatment and its aftermath really made certain I would learn the lesson and practice it daily. It was the only way to survive the experience. My yoga practice ramped up this past year and my need to find time to myself while still serving my family becomes more important as time goes by.
Yesterday I went to yoga and dedicated that practice to another dear friend wishing her peace and love while I moved through the class as she had just lost her best childhood friend. I find it brings me peace to wish it upon others and in this time where endings seem all around me I want to do that even more. I like wishing peace and clarity on those I love when I practice. I also shared that energy with my daughter who was taking a hard test as I wished her focus and my friend peace. Tomorrow I will head out on a yoga quest. A day spent in contemplation, yoga classes and music where I will see myself in a different space. I spent this morning writing and this afternoon working for the family business. Tomorrow I will also dedicate my yoga practice to a young woman whom I met this summer and who is making her transition surrounded by her family. She is still with us but time is short and as I cannot be with her I can pray and meditate and find joy in something we shared at the beginning of the summer.
I love the gift of yoga and it seems a very apt way to spend my time right now. I look at the bracelet on my arm and remember the beautiful time in Montana with my survivor sisters. Survivor seems way too passive a word for we are warriors who fought long and hard for what we have. I will miss knowing this young woman is in this world and I regret not knowing her better but for each of us blessed enough to go to Montana last June she leaves an impression we will carry with us.